The Defenders

  • Why are they fighting in a sewer with glowing blue walls?
  • Fight choreography brought to you by people not even in the same shot.
  • Oh good we’re starting with racist rich white trash cultural appropriator Danny Rand, this can only go up, right?
  • “New York City”? Who says that, unless it’s followed by “Git a rope.”?
  • Alias is still a mopey drunk, so characterization is established.
  • Cage is boring, so there’s nothing new there.
  • Murdock takes all the best cases of chemicals (they’re in everything!) either crippling or superpowering people, gets $11 million in settlement = $1.1M + court costs for him, but he still wants to go beat up bad guys instead of blowing coke off a stripper’s ass.
  • Sigourney Weaver! In a terribly staged scene with awkward dialogue. I wish this shitshow would kill me, but sooner than weeks or months.
  • Long dramatic scenes going nowhere. I need to drink more than Alias to blackout thru this.
  • Cage: “Hero’s your word, not mine.” No, in the comics he & the less shitty Danny Rand ran a biz called “Heroes For Hire”.
  • Oh no it’s a natural(?) disaster which occurs about once a month in some places, so New Yorkers panic and light up Murdock’s windows with gel lights, not that he can see.

Well, that was Ep 1. I can’t even rate this, it’s just random scenes leading to nothing. Maybe I’ll watch E2 and see if it coalesces. Maybe I’ll just self-flagellate some other way.