Nintendo Direct 2025-03-27

And another in a week (04-02) about Switch 2.

  • Dragon Quest I & II HD-2D: Nice but unneeded.
  • Raidou: Remake of a nothing game, eh.
  • Shadow Labyrinth: Pac-Mac mecha Metroidvania.
  • Patapon: Low-effort remake.
  • Yet Another Farm Sim: Farm, date, & fuck every townsfolk! Again!
  • Yet Another Metroid Prime: Has Samus not suffered enough? Quake ripoff, not 2D explorer. PSYCHIC ABILITIES. Fuck no.
  • Disney bartender game: VAL-HAL-1A but zero fuckable chars, despite ALL OF RULE 34.
  • Witchbrook: Pixely magic school. Uh, maybe?
  • Eternal Life of Goldman: Nice art. Jumpy puzzles. Maybe!
  • Gradius: Repackaged. Good games. Salamander III new zones?
  • Necrodancer: Ugh. DLC & leaderboards. UGH.
  • Tamagotchi Plaza: I am unclear if you need to constantly eat or die, leaving schoolchildren traumatized.
  • Poke mans city. No.
  • Super ugly rhythm game.
  • virtual game cards: half-assed DRM sharing, 2-week limit. Why?
  • SaGa Frontier 2 remaster: Good game, remake unneeded.
  • Monument Valley 1, 2: Good games, but you probably played them on your phone 10 years ago.
  • Monument Valley 3: Nice.
  • Golf.
  • Marvel Cosmic Invasion: Cartoon side brawler. Co-op. Maybe? But not as good as Scott Pilgrim or River City Ransom.
  • Tomodachi Life: Back for another try at social games! Nintendo never succeeds at this!
  • Nintendo Today app: Because you need another in the bewildering variety of Nintendo not-game apps. I for one organize my life around what new thing Nintendo releases, so I'll surely use this as much as the Parental Controls app. Zero.