Maybe We Ain't That Young Anymore Monday Music

Darling, you know just what I'm here for
So you're scared and you're thinking
That maybe we ain't that young anymore
Show a little faith, there's magic in the night
You ain't a beauty, but, hey, you're alright
Oh, and that's alright with me
—Bruce Springsteen, "Thunder Road", so romantic.

Largely inspired by McSweeney's Bruce Springsteen or Stephen King?, which I got all the classic SK, and many of the Boss's. #30 just made me laugh out loud.

Haunted House

You are a bold and courageous person,
afraid of nothing.
High on the hilltop near your home
there stands a dilapidated old mansion.
Some say the place is haunted,
but you don't believe in such myths.
One dark and stormy night, a light appears
in the topmost window in the tower of the old house.
You decide to investigate.
And you never return.

Ah, the classics.

[Update a few minutes later: Wow, "The Chinese Water Torture" is incredibly racist. Also it's called "waterboarding" and it's not a single drop of water, but wow.]